Your smell

This pathetic self had nothing better to do so I took your perfume and sprayed it on my green alien. I shut my eyes and sniffed that cuddly thing.

It seems like you're just sitting right next to me and it totally reminded me of how happy I used to be. I immediately broke the promise that I made to myself and cried like a fool. 

No matter how mad I am at how things are right now, I really wish you're here. 

I'm sorry. 

Of the wires and connections

It has been 5 weeks ever since the new semester started and my life has been revolving around school and only school. My attention span for every module is very inconsistent and it's making me worry a lot. ASSignments and tests are coming in and I really need to wake up. 

The girls in my class made a promise if ever any one out of the three of us were to sleep during any lectures or tutorials, the person will have to give the other two a treat at Coffee Bean. Oh well, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. So far so good, I think this method works very well. I can just laugh looking at the girls trying to maintain their heavy weighed eyes during lectures and tutorials. The three of us are too ego and don't want to give in hur hur. Well, we'll see ...

I finally gave my parents a dinner treat at Bali Thai during Mother's day. The food there was superb and it was worth every penny spent. I don't mind spending tonnes of money on good food plus my loved ones deserves the best. Love that sincerity feeling, ALHAMDULLILAH.

So have I found a new job? Yes. I got accepted but I rejected the offer even though it was very tempting. I don't think I can manage my time well if I were to work. It is going to be very hectic and I'll just die anytime soon. 

And Gnomeo? He moved on and I thought I should too. I believe he has his own dreams. Well, deep deep down it's a different story. The black diary says it all. 

I still remember, do you?

You really had no idea ...

I promise you that someday I'll stop. Yes I will but like what you've said, it takes time. 

I will. I promise you and promise is a strong word.

Kimonos

As much as I love Ashley and Bluey, I love these two kimono cards as well. I thought I lost it (couldn't believe I cried like omg). I decided to stay awake at night and look for it and finally found it on my book shelf. Yes, it's that precious because that's given by the old dead le Gnomeo. One of the card with the 'Superman' logo in it was left empty by Mr Gnomeo himself so I decided to write some thoughts inside. Oh boy how angsty can I get in the beginning but I got calmed towards the end. Apart from that, I've been spilling so much things in that black diary that I got from USS. Hah, I'm finally using it.

I'm pretty sure I am feeling much much better now even with him claiming about his new found eye-candy because it's just....amusing. Oh look! Someone started hunting already HAHA! Okay, sorry :/

And everyday without fail, a reminder from ibu, "Nur, don't worry. Just study hard...." There's some other funny things which she also said but I think it's unnecessary for me to put it here. My mum is a joker, love her! Oh not to forget, SFZ too!

I better get out of my bed and eat my brunch now then get ready for a lil window shopping at town. I should head to the SallyAhmad's after that too, miss my grandparents. Ciaaaao!

Rebound

It's been three weeks and I can not believe what I saw a few days back (well, it was removed). Super heart-wrenching. I really don't know what is going on. I'm ridiculous, yes ridiculous for still hoping for so many things to happen. What am I thinking? I'm out of my mind, I swear. 

But within that short period of time, how could you? My colleague was saying, "Shikin can I be frank with you? He moved on a long time ago." Yes, she may be right but how could you? Are you lonely that you need company? You're making everyone a rebound and now that I realised that, I was your complete rebound for sure.

Oh I'm sorry for being too paranoid and accuse you the other time but now that I've seen the truth, what more can I say? How contradicting can your words be, le Gnomeo? 

Big sigh. You can hate me now but I wouldn't want to cos I've never hated you, I just hate what you did.

And when you're needing your space

to do some navigating

I'll be here patiently waiting

to see what you find 

When all else fails, I just need to see you happy. Be happy little person, I know you are.